Sleepless night

Here I am, exhausted and yet I can't fall asleep. My mind has been racing lately. Thinking about our world. So many sad things in the news and almost everywhere I turn. And yet I know that most people are good and that most of us are just trying to live our lives the best way we know how. Then why so much suffering? Why so many evil things going on? People killing, companies exploiting and polluting, governments keeping it's citizens down... It feels so hopeless and overwhelming at times. How can we survive as a planet with all this bad stuff? The answer is Love... But Love can be mysterious sometimes. Do we really know Love?

As a mother, I know the love that I have for my children. It's intense, boundless and painful all at the same time.

I love my husband because he's my other half. Some days I question how much I love him, but when I really think about it, I always come back to the same conclusion... He's my partner, friend, lover and father to my children. He's my family. That's love.

Do I love myself? I think we all question that. I love myself more now than I ever have, but is that enough? I question myself all the time. Am I being a good person? Am I doing a good job at work? Am I a good mother, wife, friend? Does anyone really love me?! (I know the answer is YES)

Allowing Love to be in my life was not as easy as you might think though. When I was a lot younger, I really didn't think I was lovable. And so I let people into my life that fed that belief. But deep down, I knew that wasn't right. I spent a long time climbing my way up to understanding that. And yet, on sleepless nights like tonight, I can still question my worth. Maybe this is just a way of revisiting and remembering and reminding myself that if I want to be loved, I have to give love.

Ying and Yang.
Give and take.
For every action, there is a reaction.

So, it comes down to making a deliberate decision. If Love is the most important something in the Universe, then I have to embrace it. Give love and be loved. Let go of all the reasons why I think I can't be loved. Let go of all the reasons why I think I can't love back.

Love without judgement.

If all the World could love without judgement, then I think Heaven would finally come to Earth.

It's been a long time.

When things are new and bright and simply amazing, there's a lot to say. Now that my experiences have sunk in emotionally and spiritually, there seems a bit less to go on about. It's part of my every day life now. And I am excited to say, that the Reiki practice room is FINALLY ready to receive people seeking healing services!

Some thoughts about life since I've started this journey;

Love and forgiveness are two of the most important things in the Universe.

Kindness is always a better choice.

Never give up on a dream. No matter what you feel or what others may say or think.

We all will die, so decide how you want to live each day. Anger and bitterness will not stop that.

I have a mantra I say every night and when I feel I need it;

"I forgive myself.

I forgive others who may have hurt me in the past.

I live in the Now, the Present.

Thank you Lord and Universe for all that is my life.

I am truly grateful."

Namaste

Amazing progress and so close!

So I asked...

I have a co-worker and friend from Morocco who is also Muslim. Morocco was once a French colony and there is still a lot of French influence there.

So after what's been in the news these last few days regarding the terrorist attacks in France, I asked my friend about his thoughts and feelings.

He was generous to pass along to me what was said in his Mosque today;

(We strongly condemn this brutal and cowardly attack and reiterate our repudiation of any such assault on freedom of speech, even speech that mocks faiths and religious figures. The proper response to such attacks on the freedoms we hold dear is not to vilify any faith, but instead to marginalize extremists of all backgrounds who seek to stifle freedom and to create or widen societal divisions.  "We offer sincere condolences to the families and loved ones of those killed or injured in this attack. We also call for the swift apprehension of the perpetrators, who should be punished to the full extent of the law." )

It is so important to understand that these acts of terrorism are conducted by terrorists, not people with love in their hearts. They are filled with hate and rage.

These people are not representative of any true loving God.

These people chose a path of destruction and violence.

These people have paid for those actions.

Our job is to continue to keep love in our hearts. Find a way to forgive and to teach our children, our friends and everyone we meet, that love is the truth. Love will win.

Namaste

The New Year

"What has 2015 in store for me?" That's a common question. But is it the right question? Living in the present does not allow for speculation like that. So perhaps the more beneficial question is; "what is my intent for today?"

If I set my intention for the day, every day, eventually they will create the year.

So, if I go back to the original question, "What has 2015 in store for me?" then I already now the answer. It is, what ever I intend.

SO, I will set my intention for today. "I intend to be grateful for all the bounty my life has and to act with love in all things."

Namaste